10 things I hate about SEO websites and SEO software.

I hate SEO companies. Below is my list of the most egregious SEO offenses. I know hate is a politically incorrect word, but in this case it is fitting. My disgust with SEO companies comes from days, and weeks of looking for pertinent SEO information. You might relate to a few of my top 10 offenses list. If you don’t, let it serve as a warning. 99% of all SEO companies on the web look, dress, and present the same off-putting website style.

10. Every SEO company are “experts!” That’s a laugh. I imagine most “experts” are living in their mom and dad’s house, torching the bong like there is no tomorrow.

9. Getting free information will cost me an arm and a leg. Why is it that SEO service fees are hidden? That scares me dude. Then, when I order it, it becomes an invitation to repeatedly suck my bank dry?

8. The websites are so ridiculously white and clinical. The websites say “We copied the look and feel of the big SEO companies, so we are just as good.” Good luck trying to tell the difference between a real SEO company and stunt SEO companies. Yes, I said stunt SEO companies.

7. Everything will “explode” my profits! Really?! I could be selling vhs and beta machines for all you know. How much traffic will I need to explode my profits?

6. Everybody has a key to “the back door” of Yahoo. Right. The only people with back door keys to Yahoo is Yahoo, and they are not handing any out.

5. Scary and excessive “black hat SEO” warnings. You can stop reading endless pages about this drivel. Black hat equals spam of any kind to get ahead with SEO. Here is your diploma, now move on.

4. Every site is offering a “revolutionary new system to…”. All of my money problems will disappear in 48 hours, and I will be on the high road to “financial freedom” instantly. In truth, Earning a living from a website takes hard work, and focus everyday to make really big money. You will also need to own some professional and analytical SEO tools that make your SEO life easier.

3. I must attend some mucky muck conference. Why? Can’t I learn this stuff in front of my computer in my jammies? I’ll rip and burn the DVD a week after it’s over.

2. The elitism is appalling. I don’t want somebody explaining to me that my sight “needs deep SEO work.” Translation: drink this magical elixir, and money will fall from the sky into my bank account, after SEO’s drain it first! No thanks, Mr. SEO.

1. Snake oil websites can hit page one of Google, while websites and products with integrity can be outranked by SEO tricks? This one burns me the most. This is like having a search engine endorse and promote sub-par products. Sorry, There is no way to make this one funny.

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